When I am forgiving myself and others, I realize that the only person I can change is me. I don't have the power to change another. I can forgive them, set a boundary, make suggestions according to my own experience, strength and hope, but I can't make them do anything. All I can do is pray for them, and ask for what is good for them, according to THEIR God's Will, not mine. I am not the power. I can't be their HP.
