Today's Thought - May

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May 1

Some days I feel like a tightrope walker.
- Jeannette N.

We all perform a balancing act, trying to keep perspective on what's important and what is not. Sometimes we fall — crazy drivers cut into our lane, the supermarket line takes forever, the baby's crying. At those times a minor insult at work or a cross word from a friend is just too much, and we lose our cool — and our balance.

During our years of active addiction we were impulsive, living in an all-or-nothing, black-and-white world, completely out of balance. Minor slights became major issues. We were subject to any whim our distorted thoughts cooked up.

We've had lots of practice being out of balance, so we have to work harder to regain it, but now we have the tools to change. Our program gives us a new focus, reminds us of what's important in our lives. We're reminded, too, of our powerlessness over people, places, and things. These ideas are new to us at first. We thought we had to control everything and everyone around us, and so we failed. But now we're learning how to keep our balance, and recover it when we've lost it. With practice, we'll get better every day. Now, we're learning how to let go and let God.

Today help me remember what's important. Help me keep my balance.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

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May 2

We can act ourselves into right thinking easier than we can think ourselves into right acting.
--Anonymous

The best thing for us to do in our 12 Step Program is to be honest in how we act and think. We must be true to that belief.

We can't think for others, and they can't think for us. Friends can tell us the lessons they have learned from their experiences. If those lessons fit us, we can use them to help guide us and our thinking. We often hear, "Take what you need and leave the rest."

As good for us as our ideas are, we must not force them on others. We can only offer them. And we won't be true to ourselves if we are jealous of other people's ideas. We never know what we can do until we try, and we can't be sure what ideas are best for us until we test them.

Am I dedicated to the beliefs that are best for me in my recovery?

You are reading from the book:

Easy Does It by Anonymous

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May 3

Information is of two kinds. We know a subject ourselves, or we know where we can find information upon it.
--Samuel Johnson

Knowledge is power. The more information we have, the more empowered we feel. The unknown can be scary. We don't know what we're getting into so we don't act at all. When we know our legal rights and obligations, we start making decisions we feel good about. We can confront difficult situations with confidence instead of fear.

We can get information about our legal rights concerning debt and divorce or debt and collection agencies by visiting the library, a lawyer, Debtors Anonymous meetings, financial advisers, and nonprofit consumer credit agencies.

Today I will make it my responsibility to learn as much as I can about my debt and related legal issues.

You are reading from the book:

Letting Go of Debt by Karen Casanova

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May 4

Lay not up for yourselves treasures on earth where moth and dust doth corrupt, where thieves break through and steal; but lay up treasures in heaven ... for where your treasure is, there will be your heart also.
--Matthew 6:19 21

The True Treasure

Consider the following story of misplaced priorities. While hiking in the wilderness, I met a man whose T-shirt carried the following message: "He who dies with the most toys, wins."

As I pondered those words, I was sure that the author meant the opposite of what he said. No one on his deathbed ever stated, "I wish I had spent more time at the office." We were put on this earth not to accumulate "toys," but to reap the gifts of the spirit. These gifts come to us when we dedicate our lives to something greater than ourselves — a path of service in the world, the raising of a loving family, the creation of beauty through art, or any passion that inspires one.

Having lived in this manner, you can look back over your life with a real sense of fulfillment. By following the path of peace, love, and joy, you will discover your true treasure — one that transcends death itself.

He who dies having followed his heart, wins.

You are reading from the book:

Listening to Your Inner Voice by Douglas Bloch

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May 5

Growing

We all perform on two stages: one public, one private. The Public stage is what we do and say. The Private stage is what we think and what we rehearse in our minds to do on the Public stage. Even though we may never perform it, what we rehearse in our minds helps mold our character and guide our actions.

Are we rehearsing anger, fights, and what we're going to tell that SOB next time? Are we rehearsing drug use, the old ways of living? If so, we are risking the recovery we have achieved.

To keep growing and to keep building character, we need to rehearse kindness, patience, and love. We need to practice awareness of our Higher Power in our lives.

Am I growing?

May I practice kindness, patience, and love in all my affairs today.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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May 6

Reflection for the Day

I can attain real dignity, importance and individuality only by a dependence on a Power, which is great and good, beyond anything I can imagine or understand. I will try my utmost to use this Power in making all my decisions. Even though my human mind cannot forecast what the outcome will be, I will try to be confident that whatever comes will be for my ultimate good. Just for today, will I try to live this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once?

Today I Pray

May I make no decision; engineer no change in the course of my life stream, without calling upon my Higher Power. May I have faith that God's plan for me is better than any scheme I could devise for myself.

Today I Will Remember

God is the architect. I am the builder.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

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May 7

God insists that we ask, not because He needs to know our situation, but because we need the spiritual discipline of asking.
-- Catherine Marshall

An omniscient God must know what we desire before we ask. God knows that what we really need most is reliance on God. And how do we develop reliance? Like most other things, by practicing.

If it weren't for the need to remind us daily or hourly that all power flows from our Creator, we could just say a quick prayer at the beginning of each week, or each year, and be done with it. Surely God could fill our requests a year ahead of time. But getting our wishes granted isn't the purpose of prayer. Getting to know God is the purpose.

I need to be in touch with my Creator every hour of the day.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

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May 8

No matter what faces us — an unhappy relationship, a serious operation or illness, a feeling of uselessness or helplessness — it is vital to realize that there is a solution.

We must not expect that the solution to our problem will bring us immediate peace of mind. Focusing our energies and emotions on the answer, not the problem, will, however, alleviate much of the futility and frustration we feel.

A medical doctor, George S. Stevenson, wrote, "The solution may not give you everything you want. Sometimes, it may give you nothing but a chance to start all over again. But whatever little it gives you is much more than you give yourself by letting your emotions tear you apart."

Today I will focus my energies and emotions on the solution, not the problem. I will allow the solution to flow through me, with the help of my Higher Power, knowing there is a satisfactory answer to my difficulty.

You are reading from the book:

The Reflecting Pond by Liane Cordes

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May 9

To speak ill of others is a dishonest way of praising ourselves.
--Will Durant

Sometimes we say bad things about others. When we do this, it makes us look bad too. Our friends worry what we might say about them behind their backs. They're afraid to trust us. We become known as gossips.

The things we say about other people tell a lot about us. We are kind or unkind. We gossip or we don't. This doesn't mean we have to say everyone is wonderful all the time. As we work our program to see ourselves better, we begin to see other people more clearly too. We see their strong points and their weak points. But we can know these things without gossiping about them.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me see others clearly, and in their best light. Let me bring out the good in others.

Action for the Day

Today, I'll list the people I'm closest to at work, school, and home. I'll think of how I talk about them to others. Am I kind?

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

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May 10

Maturity doesn't come with age or intellectual wisdom, only with love.
--Ruth Casey

We may have thought being mature meant being "grown-up." This meant acting rationally, showing good judgment, no longer exhibiting childish behavior. It's doubtful that we ever considered the expression of love as an act of maturity. However, we are learning that the key to sustained growth is the ability to love one another and ourselves.

It seems so much easier to focus on others' faults than on their assets. In childhood we learned to compete with our classmates, and this taught us to be critical of one another. No teacher tested us on how we expressed love; rather, we worked on spelling and multiplication tables, and we were pitted against other students for the gold stars.

Now we are discovering how much more comfortable life is when we all get gold stars. We are handling every situation more sanely now that we have realized the gift of serenity that accompanies our expression of love.

My growth, my maturity in this program, can best be measured by my attitude today. Am I loving, or am I still competing with the others?

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

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May 11

Presence

"C'mon. Hurry. Let's go," my friend said, shifting nervously from one foot to the other.

I looked around. Another friend, Michael, had just walked into the room. I hadn't seen him for a while. I felt compelled to go over and talk to him, even though I didn't have anything important to say.

"Please, let's go," my friend said again. I started to leave with him, then changed my mind.

"Give me just a few minutes," I said, walking away from my friend and moving toward Michael. We didn't talk about much, Michael and I. But I'll never forget that conversation. He was killed in an accident two weeks later.

Some people suggest that our biggest regret when we die will be that we didn't work less and spend more time with the people we love. That may be true, but for me, I think it will be that I wasn't more completely present for each person, task, and moment in my life.

Action: Do you remember the "stop, look, and, listen" slogan from when you were a child? Every so often, even for a few minutes each day, try to remember to practice it.

Slow down or stop - depending on how fast you're going.

Look - see where you are, whom you're with, what you're doing. Give whatever you're doing your attention.

Listen - as much as possible, quell your anxiety, cease your mental chatter, and just listen to nature, to other people, to God, and to yourself.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

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May 12

Every human being is a problem in search of a solution.
--Ashley Montagu

Each of us is a strong and fragile creature. We're always subject to forces outside our control, and we're learning steps for living that help us cope and rise above these problems. Our particular situation might seem special to us but in another sense, everyone's situation is a unique problem. Spiritual growth is the result of coming face to face with our own situation, feeling the brunt of our own puzzlement, recognizing no recipe will apply completely, and then trusting our Higher Power as we make unsure responses.

No school or parent can ever teach us enough to smooth our search for solutions. We become complete human beings by living through the muddle, by truly trusting our connections with God and other people to carry us along until we find clarity again. We progress into adulthood when we meet our own particular life crises. We learn to see we have this process in common with every human being. Rather than resist our problems, we band together with others and pool our strength to find solutions.

My problems today are opportunities for spiritual growth.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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May 13

Having boundaries doesn't complicate life; boundaries simplify life.
--Beyond Codependency

There is a positive aspect to boundary setting. We learn to listen to ourselves and identify what hurt us and what we don't like. But we also learn to identify what feels good.

When we are willing to take some risks and begin actively doing so, we will enhance the quality of our life.

What do we like? What feels good? What brings us pleasure? Whose company do we enjoy? What helps us to feel good in the morning? What's a real treat in our life? What are the small, daily activities that make us feel nurtured and cared for?

We have deprived ourselves too long. There is no need to do that anymore, no need. If it feels good, and the consequences are self-loving and not self-defeating, do it!

Today, I will do for myself those little things that make life more pleasurable. I will not deny myself healthy treats.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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May 14

Is he related to something infinite or not? That is the telling question of life.
--Carl Jung

The times that life works best are when we get out of the way and let the power work through us. The writer says of an inspired short story, "I didn't write this story; it seemed to write itself." After a record-breaking performance an athlete recalls, "I just had an 'on' day. My shots kept falling in."

Each of us has had moments when we felt as if we were riding the crest of a wave or were being pushed from behind by a gentle wind. The more you can surrender to the universal energy and go with its flow, the easier life becomes.

Compare this experience to that of trying to control and manipulate life through the limited ego. Everything becomes a strain and an effort, a constant struggle. We tire easily. By the time we cross the finish line, we wonder if the race was worth running.

A better way is stated by the paradox, "You give it all up to have it all." Whatever your current situation, step back and let the power work through you. You'll be amazed at the miracles that occur. When your will and the Higher will are aligned, all things become possible.

You are reading from the book:

Listening to Your Inner Voice by Douglas Bloch

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May 15

The crisis of our time . . . is a crisis not of the hands but of the hearts.
--Archibald MacLeish

We singlemindedly search for love, for belonging, for affirmation from others that will wipe out the torment of alienation that haunts our wakefulness and our dreams. "Does he truly care?" we wonder. "Did she try to call as she said?" Our fears, coupled with our loneliness, turn us inward and the seduction of isolation tightens its hold.

Our hearts plead, sometimes silently, other times hysterically, for comfort. And paradoxically, another's crisis can end our own. If we can hear the call from another's heart today, our own hearts will discover the comfort we crave.

If we look closely and with love toward the people so carefully placed in our midst, we'll discover many hearts, like our own, searching for acceptance.

Let's relieve our haunting alienation and extend a hand in love to a lonely friend today.

You are reading from the book:

Worthy of Love by Karen Casey