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08-12-2013, 06:03 AM | #1 | |
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Working the Program
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I am powerless over alcohol, I need to get honest and surrender to the program. I need to find a Higher Power that works for me. I need to build trust and a relationship with this Source of Power that can do for me, what I can't do for myself. Then I have to decide whether I am going to stay or go back out. I have to decide to put my life into the care of the God of my understanding. I had to learn to trust the program and see that it could work for me. It is about recognizing that this is a family disease, that all members need the application of the 12 Steps to heal mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. They work if I work for them. I have a right to exercise my judgment, change my mind, look at life from a new perspective, and allow myself to be my own person. This was my experience, strength and hope posted on another site. When you read my posts, that over the last 21 years, I have gone to AA, NA, CA, Al-Anon, Nar-Anon, ACoA, Women for Sobriety, SOS (on line when I sponsored an athiest) and CoDA. They say, do what ever it takes for your sobriety. I never went to Overeaters Anonymous or Emotions Anonymous (have papers for their program), but I had a sponsor who had been a member of both. On top of that I went for outside counselling for about 6 years, off and on to deal with certain issues. The last was for Sexual Abuse counselling at 15 years sober. I thought I had dealt with it all when doing my 4th and 5th, but the last relationship, triggered a lot of old feelings, so I had to deal with them and I chose an outside source. No matter where I went, AA has always been my base. The common denominator is AA's 12 Steps and Traditions. The substance isn't the problem, recovery is an inside job, it starts with me.
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08-12-2013, 06:06 AM | #2 |
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Snagged from another site. The 12 Steps They told me "do the steps, all 12 of them than....you'll find your Friend" they went on to say "believe me it will get a little better.... day by day" Step One... there was nothing I could do quite depressed.... feeling blue Step Two.... I sought a new belief slowly.... it provided some relief Step Three.... answers I began to find it brought about some peace of mind Step Four....I looked deep inside no longer did I want to run or hide Step Five....I put my trust in Him and told another all my sins Step Six... I saw all the defects based on shame I'd throw away all those old games Step Seven.... I found a gift in humility a new wold I'd see Step Eight...a list was made when I searched my soul years of abuse had took its toll Step Nine.... I began making amends apologies was the only message I'd send Step Ten.... the truth was easy to see an inventory would help keep me free Step Eleven....my new Friendship was strong with prayer and meditation days weren't so long Step Twelve... I couldn't wait to share and let others know we care They spoke the truth life did get better I found peace within which made the world more peaceful and serene --Dave Harm
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08-12-2013, 06:13 AM | #3 |
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Pages 63 and 64 in the 12 and 12. This is step 6. I asked myself at the beginning of this step..Do I want to change, to grow as a person or do I want to hang onto these things for the rest of my life, crippling my growth? Step six says" Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Posted by Schell
Change has been one thing that is constant in my recovery, and yet ironically, the same sponsor through out my recovery hasn't happened. I have been fired, I have been taken back on, at my request. I have had an AA, NA, and Al-Anon sponsor, I have had an AA, and an AA co-Sponsor, a Native American woman I was working with at the time, different combinations, my second Al-Anon sponsor passed away on Monday. My 1st Al-Anon sponsor and I were co-sponsoring each other when she passed away. When I asked the sponsor who passed away to go through the Blue Prints to Progress by Al-Anon and she dropped me as a sponsor. She said she had nothing to give me. I had trouble understanding it. We had about the same time in the fellowship, we had both come from abusive marriages and we both had sons who were addicts. She told me that every time I shared at a meeting, her mouth was opened in awe with what I shared, and I couldn't understand this because we both had about the same amount of time in the program. I wish we could have shared more, she passed away about two years ago.
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08-12-2013, 06:17 AM | #4 | |
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This comes from a newsletter in Malaysia, don't even remember how I connected with it, and I have deleted piles of them, and still have folders of them filed away. I just don't have the time to process them all. The material was on my sites, but I have more up-to-date material now I should look at. There just isn't enough me to go around. I have a different view for the post part, people say, "Oh that is negative, forget it!" I say "No." Nothing in life is all negative." They will discount it. They miscount it and miss out on a very useful gem. They see something and think, "Oh, that is positive, "I want that, but they don't look closely, and perhaps there is a tiny flaw." We are not all good or bad, positive or negative, and for me, recovery, is about learning to find the balance in our life. Nurturing our weaknesses and allowing them to grow stronger. Supporting our strengths so they don't grow weak. Just because we have in today, doesn't mean we will have it in tomorrow. Fibromyalgia has taught me a lot about that. Acceptance is the key in today.
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08-12-2013, 06:25 AM | #5 |
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My life is none of my business. I just suit up, show up; be an example of AA and leave the rest to God. - Sharon B. Alkiespeaks Was told this by my spiritual advisor many years ago. Suit up, show up, and the rest will follow. If you have recovery, show it. Clean up your mouth, clean up your mouth, clean up your act, work the steps, and before you know it, you will see God working in your life. Quote: My life is none of my business. I just suit up, show up; be an example of AA and leave the rest to God. - Sharon B. Alkiespeaks Was told this by my spiritual adviser many years ago. Suit up, show up, and the rest will follow. If you have recovery, show it. Clean up your mouth, clean up your mouth, clean up your act, work the steps, and before you know it, you will see God working in your life. Walk Softly and carry a Big Book - Quote: Encouragement from an old-timer can turn a newcomer's life around. I was told to stick with the old-timers. I said, "Where do you find them. I had trouble finding the women, unless you went to their group, and you knew what group they belong to, you were out of luck. I was fortunate, back then I was able to travel and went from one end of the city to the other. I said, "God you protect me in the day, so I need you to protect me in the night. I need to go out to these meetings. Please take away the fear, lead, guide and protect in all things, Amen. In the 12 years all I met up with was a drunk passed out between the apartment doors in my building. I learned to walk tall with confidence, be my own person, own my own space, and walked like I had a right to be there and knew were I was going, to an AA meeting and no one was going to stand in my way. A little faith will take you a long way.
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08-12-2013, 06:27 AM | #6 |
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God would give me just enough light for the step I am on...that I would learn to walk by faith. I read this quote on another site. I had never heard it put this way before. I found it to be very empowering. When I am stuck, I know I can surrender in the moment, accept what is in the moment, and ask for help and it will be given to me. It is my personal belief that the Light comes in at the point of surrender. I can't, God can, and I have to ask for His help. I have to follow it up with action. Surrender is a Principle of Step One for me. God brought me here, and gives me the tools to stay here, one day at a time. It goes hand in hand with honesty and acceptance. Quote: "Step One is the base of the pyramid of the rest of the alcoholic's life" - unknown
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07-02-2014, 06:27 PM | #7 |
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Not sure if these are reruns or posted on another area.
~ The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions ~ I came to a meeting, all sad and alone, So sick and tired, of the life I had known, ...Aching and dying, deep down inside,... And feeling the pain, from the things i must hide. They told me they loved me, and were glad I was there, Who are these people, and why should they care? But the more that I listened, the more I could see, This room full of addicts, were just like me. I started to share, trying hard not to cry, and I no longer felt like I wanted to die. I wanted to live, but hadn't a clue, Of what to say, feel, or do. These people were clean, and would show me the way, So i listened some more, to what they had to say, They spoke of a God, and "just for one day" So I thought, "What the hell," and I started to pray. They said "get a sponsor," and "keep coming back". they said a program was all I did lack. They said "Work the steps, or your going to die". So I got me a sponsor and i started to try. I shared with my sponsor who I had become, The people I had hurt, the things I had done, He told me he loved me, and then shared with me, The things he had done, and who he used to be. That's when i knew, and could finally see, That if i worked the steps, that I too could be free. Free from drugs, and feeling that way, Free from obsession, just for today So I listen to what you have to share, Tell you I love You, let you know that i care, Let you know I have found, a much better way, Its working a program, we call N.A. It's sharing my experience, strength, and hope as I trudge, Its living a life, and not holding a grudge. It's sharing with newcomers, as they wonder in, And as they start to listen, they know they can win. If we all really listen, to what's being said, The thing's that they shared, the book that is read. If we listen and learn, we will surely see, How truly delightful recovery can be. Anonymous
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07-02-2014, 06:28 PM | #8 |
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HOW TO JEOPRODIZE YOUR RECOVERY:
ARGUMENTATIVENESS: Arguing small, ridiculous points of view, looking for excuses to get angry. CHEMICALS: Using pills to ease tension. thingyINESS: Think you have it made, forgetting to guard against the things that lead to emotional problems. COMPLACENCY: Letting up on disciplines, getting lazy on recovery. DEPRESSION: Unreasonable despair, staying stuck, giving up. DISHONESTY: Little lies, deceits and making excuses. EXHAUSTION: Becoming overly tired, being a workaholic. If you don't feel well physically, your thinking is apt to deteriorate. EXPECTING TOO MUCH FROM OTHERS: Expecting others to follow your script and to change because you have changed. FORGETTING GRATITUDE: Forgetting how things have improved since you first started. FRUSTRATION: When things are not going your way. IMPATIENCE: Things are not happening fast enough, others not doing what you think they should do when you think they should do it. SELF PITY: Why do these things happen to me? Why do I have these problems? SKIPPING THE BASICS: Meetings, Fellowship, Meditation, Prayer, Personal Inventory. OMNIPOTENCE: Thinking you are all powerful, that you have everything under "CONTROL" ignoring suggestions and advice, having all the answers. WANTING TOO MUCH: Expecting recovery overnight, over-emphasizing the material things, concentrating on not having what you want rather than concentrating on wanting what you have.
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07-02-2014, 06:28 PM | #9 |
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THINGS THAT CAN STAND IN THE WAY OF YOUR RECOVERY
D.E.N.I.A.L. - Don't Even Notice I Am Lying Lips are moving, we're off and running. Ever told a story, joke or lie so many times that even you believe it's true? H.O.W. - Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness This ones for you, Dad! Hope you like it. S.L.I.P. - Sobriety Lost It's Priority / So Long, I'm Perfect If you don't want to slip, stay out of slippery places! B.I.B.L.E. - Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth Take it as you will. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less. My Way - No, My Way! - No My Way! You're as sick as your secrets. Most of the time, folks see it, know it, or feel it in some way or another, anyway. Get it? S.O.B.E.R. - Son Of a !!!!!, Everything's Real WOW! Life happens at the funniest times! F.I.N.E. [I'm] Frustrated, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotional F.E.A.R. Face Everything And Recover N.U.T.S. Not Using The Steps E.G.O. Edging God Out D.E.N.I.A.L. Don't Even Notice I Am Lying H.A.L.T. [Don't get too] Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired H.O.P.E. Happy Our Program Exists H.O.W. Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness G.O.D. Good Orderly Direction B.I.G. B.O.O.K. Believing In God Beats Our Old Knowledge S.L.I.P. Sobriety Losing Its Priority A.C.T.I.O.N. Any Change To Improve Our Nature P.R.O.G.R.A.M. People Relying On God Relaying A Message S.T.E.P.S. Solutions To Every Problem Sober K.I.S.S. Keep It Simple, Sweetheart Seven missed meetings makes one weak. HALT: Don't get too Hungry, too Angry, too Lonely, or too Tired!! If you do what you always did, you will get what you always got. or If you keep doin' what your doin' you'll keep gettin' what your gettin' A.B.C. - Acceptance, Belief, Change A.C.T.I.O.N. - Any Change Toward Improving One’s Nature E.G.O. - Edging God Out F.A.I.L.U.R.E. - Fearful, Arrogant, Insecure, Lonely, Unsure, Resentful, Empty F.E.A.R. - Face Everything & Recover /False Expectations Appearing Real G.O.D. - Good Orderly Direction H.A.L.T. - Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired H.E.L.P. - Hope, Encouragement, Love, Patience T.I.M.E. - Things I Must Learn Progress not perfection. Change the things I can.
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07-02-2014, 06:29 PM | #10 |
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AA slogans, sayings, and assorted inspirations
The steps keep us from suicide; the traditions keep us from homicide. The only thing alcoholics do in moderation is the 12 steps! The elevator is broken - take the steps! Step 13: My life is unmanageable, and I want to share it with you. It's alcohol-ism, not -wasm. Insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Gossip hurts - and sometimes kills. Pain is necessary, suffering is optional! If nothing changes, nothing changes. If you do what you always did, you'll get what you always got. Some things have to be believed to be seen. Feelings aren't facts!!! In AA, first we remove the anesthesia, then we operate. Fellowship is the meeting after the meeting. Let us love you until you learn to love yourself. Isolation is the dark room where we develop our 'negatives'. Compare and despair. Don't compare you insides to other people's outsides. Let go or get dragged. If your spinning your wheels, try getting out of the driver's seat. If your a$$ falls off, pick it up, put it in a paper bag, and carry it to a meeting. Remember the cost of your last drink or drug when observing the 7th tradition. Take an action, then let go of the results. Carry the message, not the mess. Don't tease your disease. It's the first car of a train that kills you, not the caboose. Relapse is NOT a requirement. Relapse begins long before you pick up the drink/drug. If you hang around a barbershop long enough, eventually you'll get a haircut. Those who matter, don't mind; those who mind, don't matter. Expectations are preconceived resentments. Serenity isn't freedom from the storm; it is peace within the storm. Don't speak unless you can improve on silence. You don't need to "find God"; He isn't lost. Tell it to your sponsor, or you will be telling it to a bartender. Surrendering means you don't have to fight any more. Surrender Dorothy! I didn't use drugs, drugs used me. You can be just a crazy sober as you were drunk, you'll just remember it the next day. AA Sayings - The Complete? List - "Easy Does It", "Keep it Simple Stupid", and many more. SPONSOR: Sober Person Offering Newcomers Suggestions On Recovery Original Source Unknown
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09-19-2014, 02:49 AM | #11 | |
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"Think God Thoughts after Him!" If I turn my will and my life over to God, after making the decision to look for Him in Step Two, then follow it up with Step Three by finding the quiet and listen in the stillness to pray and listen for His answers, then what comes through is either God Thoughts if I have put my thoughts into His care. Sometimes my thoughts can get in the way so it is important to quiet them if not eliminate them before I start. Quiet the chatter, and then His Love and Direction can come through. I have always done that in recovery, but for some reason this put a new perspective on it for me. This reminds me of the banners, pins, etc, "What would Jesus do?" He walked the talk and in my first year in recovery, I would take my Bible and only used the Books of the New Testament from Acts to Revelation, Psalms and Proverbs for my daily meditation. Later I was to realize, I was limiting God. I not only had a narrow outlook on religion, and an anger against the church, that I had to expand my vision and I went on a spiritual journey that broadened my understanding of my Higher Power. When I think God thoughts, I have a good day! God is good. Good is God! This was posted on another site in 2010. Still good in today. This is why they call it a spiritual program.
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10-05-2014, 12:54 PM | #12 |
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For change and revival of your spirit, change around your meetings. Go to some you haven't been to or ones who haven't been to for a while. Especially, go to the ones that you decided in early recovery that you didn't like. Rotate your movie night or your golf game with a night out with some recovery friends, unless they are going with you to the movie and the golf game. Do you invite newcomers into your circle?
Do you rotate leadership in your group? Are the same people always doing the same positions in service? Are you active? Have you worked the traditions? Do you practice them in your home? They are applicable there as well as at your group and in the community. Rotate your thinking to broaden your horizons.
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10-16-2014, 09:14 PM | #13 |
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The Steps are in the order they are in for the best of all possible reasons— they work that way!
There is a divine logic in the order of the Twelve Steps. As we work each Step, we look deeper and deeper into ourselves (pealing that onion). It’s not possible to work Steps One through Twelve without experiencing a profound, positive change. This is why our predecessors insist on “writing & living” not just “doing” the Steps. To try to work the Steps out of order is to fail. One cannot make a list of those one has harmed, for example, if one has not first taken a moral inventory. How can we do anything in a “searching and fearless” way until we have abandoned fear by turning our will and our lives over to the care of a Higher Power? The process can’t be hurried; there aren’t any shortcuts. Step Two follows Step One, and Step Tree follows Step Two, in a natural and important progression. SITUATIONAL WORKSHEET (Apply to any situation and watch how it works) 1.We admitted that we were powerless over our addiction, that our lives had become unmanageable. · What symptom of your disease did you see? (Anger, pain, jealousy, abandonment, frustration, inadequacy) ·At what time did you perceive that your disease had control? (What were you thinking, physically doing, or feeling?) The first step happens… 2. We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. · When did you “come to believe” before this situation? (Possibly a similar situation or just another situation that gave you the faith to continue on.) · What is a power greater than self in this situation? (Is it a person, feeling, or…?) · In coming to believe, acceptance is what happens. In accepting the situation and knowing that you do not need to stay there, balance is possible. Sanity comes from balance Now begins the action. 3.We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. · What is my will? (It is what I want to do.) · What is my life? (It is everyday happenings that go on with my participation.) · What are we going to turn over to the CARE OF GOD? (Symptoms that made your life unmanageable, i.e. anger, pain, jealousy, abandonment, frustration, inadequacy; See Step #1) 4.We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. An inventory is a look at what I am and am not willing to live with today. In an inventory we deal with: “What is bothering me in the here and now”? (See: Basic Text page 28.) Do not confuse an inventory with a biography. · List your assets. · How often have I placed myself or been placed in this position? · When was the last time I was in this or a similar situation? · What did I do then? What was the outcome? Make a list answering the following two questions: · What am I willing to live with? · What am I not willing to live with? Changing the pattern. Actively making changes according to what you are and what you are not willing to live with. If you find in your list that you are not willing to have things continue as they have in the past and/or are continuing now, then you must make a physical, mental and spiritual change. This is done by making a commitment to what you are willing to do. Make a commitment to self and follow through all the way. Never do half the job. Become involved, be a part of – not a part from. Stand up for what you believe in. Do not compromise your principles. You are worthy! 5.We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Call or go see your sponsor or sponsee. Talk with them about all the above and how you came to this point. In doing this, you allow another person the opportunity to get to know you. This allows them the opportunity to tell you what they hear you saying rather than you making a determination on your own as to what is or what is not. We don’t always give ourselves a break or sometimes we give ourselves too much of a break. 6. We were entirely read to have God remove all these defects of character. We have character traits, and have determined in the third step which of those character traits we are ready to have removed by allowing God to hold onto them. This gives us an opportunity to make a searching and fearless moral inventory. We asked God to take these defective character traits that He has in His care and remove them permanently. In doing this we give up all rights to manipulate the situation – to change the outcome. 7. We humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings. · What are shortcomings? It is our will wanting to take over to do what we want when we know we can’t or shouldn’t. (Many times it is our desire to manipulate circumstances to have the outcome the way we want it.) What is our footwork here? To make a conscious effort not to repeat previous actions such as acting out rage, cussing endlessly. To practice what we are willing to live with as seen in Step 4. We must do the footwork to oversee our actions. In order to make changes, we must participate. God isn’t going to do it for us. God simply gives us the courage, strength, and ability to change. 8. We made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. · Who has been, will be, could be and/or is being harmed? (Self and other person(s) in the situation, and those surrounding the situation.) After applying these principles to similar situations, this list will get shorter and shorter. The time will come when there is no need to make a list. You will be able to see where you are in a situation, stop before you get caught up in your disease, and harm yourself and/or others. You will just need to look at everyone involved in the situation to determine who or what could be at risk. 9. We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. · How do you make amends to yourself, others and those who are no longer here? For yourself: - FORGIVE YOURSELF AND CHANGE THE PATTERN! For those on your list – you must determine if it is ego or humility that motivates your amends. “I’m sorry” just isn’t enough. · Why do you want to make amends to these people? Remember that people are just that – people. They too are living according to how they believe and their own values. 10. We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Stay in the “right now.” Look at your part in the situation and what part you played in it. · What was your part in the situation? · Did you abuse, use or justify anything? · Did you overcome your shortcomings and not repeat past reactions and/or behaviors? · What have you been doing in the last few hours? · Are you pleased with your actions and/or reactions? 11. We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for the knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. In a situation when looking at the process, ask God to give you guidance in doing His will. Talk to God about all areas and be real honest with self-assessment. If you’re not honest with others, be honest with self so that you can remain a channel of God’s will. 12. Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. What is a spiritual awakening? It is what you have realized in working through this situation. It is an understanding or realization of a new way to live, a new way of feeling about self and those surrounding self. We have the opportunity to change, to grow, and gain the ability to become happy, joyous and free. Spiritual awakenings are a result of applying these (not just step #1, step #2, or step #3) principles to EVERY situation in our lives. The Basic Text states at the beginning of How It Works: “If you want what we have to offer and are willing to make the effort to get it, then you are ready to take certain steps. These are the principles that made our recovery possible.” A member received this from her sponsor many years ago. They are indeed a living thing. I need to take the words off the pages of the book and apply them to my life.
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10-16-2014, 09:16 PM | #14 | |
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A Guide to the 12 Steps by Dr. Silkworth
http://silkworth.net/aahistory/Guide...eps_Akron.html Quote:
This is a one day at a time program. What Step did you need today? Did you start the day with the 1, 2, 3 Waltz? I can't, God can, just for today, I choose to let Him. When was the last time you did a Step 4? It is suggested that you do one yearly. As you grow in the program, your perception changes and you get to look at things from a new angle and it brings a new light to things which brings about further healing, if you allow it to come in. Have you found any more willingness to make an amend to that person that you put on the back burner. Have you made an amend to yourself? Did you make an amend to God. When was the last time you did a Step 11. When was the last time you went on a 12 Step call?
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10-16-2014, 09:15 PM | #15 |
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The 12 Steps
they told me "do the steps, all 12 of them than....you'll find your Friend" they went on to say "believe me it will get a little better.... day by day" Step One... there was nothing I could do quite depressed.... feeling blue Step Two.... I sought a new belief slowly.... it provided some relief Step Three.... answers I began to find it brought about some peace of mind Step Four....I looked deep inside no longer did I want to run or hide Step Five....I put my trust in Him and told another all my sins Step Six... I saw all the defects based on shame I'd throw away all those old games Step Seven.... I found a gift in humility a new wold I'd see Step Eight...a list was made when I searched my soul years of abuse had took its toll Step Nine.... I began making amends apologies was the only message I'd send Step Ten.... the truth was easy to see an inventory would help keep me free Step Eleven....my new Friendship was strong with prayer and meditation days weren't so long Step Twelve... I couldn't wait to share and let others know we care they spoke the truth life did get better I found peace within which made the world more peaceful and serene --Dave Harm __________________ Found this on a Google Search: http://www.barefootsworld.net/aastepswithsponsee.html http://aa.activeboard.com/t39867757/...-dump-sponsee/
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