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#1 | |
Super Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Hamilton, ON
Posts: 25,078
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My mind was open, but it was conditional. I knew that my best thinking got me to the doors of recovery. I knew that I had to change my way of thinking but I wasn't too sure that I was willing to accept yours any more than I was willing to let mine go. I learned that if I kept my mind open, that I would hear what I needed to hear, when I needed to hear it. Willing! Willing to go any length to stay sober. Willing to go to meetings. Willing to work the Steps. Willing to get a sponsor. Even more important, was the willingness to call her, in good times as well as the bad times. Not always sure, how it works, just know it does. When I do the basics, do what is suggested, go to meetings, get a sponsor, get a group, get active and not pick up, no matter what. Not only not my drug of choice but not substituting one for the other. I stayed sick a long time because of it. I tried my way and my way didn't work. Posted on another site in 2010
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Love always, Jo I share because I care. ![]() |
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#2 |
Super Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Hamilton, ON
Posts: 25,078
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H.O.W. still works in my life today. It is a one day at a time program and each day I must find the courage and strength to be honest, open-minded, and willing to face each day as it comes.
I can't base my todays on my past. That was then, this is now, and if I am working a program of recovery, I have the tools to work with to stay clean and sober in today. That isn't just physical, it means mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. It doesn't matter what substance it is that is standing between me and God, it is but a symptom of my dis-ease, the problem has always been me. My sponsor told me to change problems to challenges. Problems you can stay stuck in, challenges you can overcome. To help me with the challenges in my life, I use the 12 Steps, Traditions, and Concepts to make for a better way of life, to the best of my ability each day. I read the literature, go to recovery sites, and I try to share my experience, strength, and hope with others. As I have said many times, "It doesn't matter which room you put me in, I can identify." I learned to identify instead of comparing. I compared and stayed sick.
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Love always, Jo I share because I care. ![]() |
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#3 | |
Super Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Hamilton, ON
Posts: 25,078
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Everyone mentioned "God" and this is a spiritual program and I thought I knew, after all hadn't I been raised in religion for twenty-two years, who are they to tell me, I am a leading authority don't you know? It didn't stop me from being an addict who became addicted to alcohol and prescription drugs, and to try out any other substance that came my way. What I came to believe in was the program. I saw that it was doing for other than I had been trying to do for eight years before I got here. I tried quitting my way, and it didn't work. I couldn't STAY QUIT, they had laughter in their eyes, their eyes shone with a radiance I hadn't seen for a long time. I thought they were laughing at me, when in fact they were laughing with me, because they had been were I was, and had been able to move on and find a new life for themselves. Step One - I came to recovery and I kept coming so I didn't have to come back. Meetings, meetings and more meetings, and when I got tired of meetings, I went to more meetings. I ended up going because I wanted to not because I had to. I had a big fear that if I missed a meeting, I would relapse. That was changed into a faith that if I go to a meeting, I don't have to pick up today. Step Two - I came to believe it would work for me and help me to remove the insanity in my life and bring my life into balance. It says I could not would return me to sanity, it is only through work and an honest desire to keep coming and a willingness to change. Step Three - I came to believe the program would work for me. It is a spiritual program open to everyone who is willing to believe it will work for them. For me, I didn't find God, the God of my own understanding, until I worked the steps and found myself. When I got here, I wasn't capable of knowing, I only remembered what I was told to believe and had no understanding of what I believed in me, most of all myself. When I made the decision, I made the decision to work the rest of the steps into my life, and they in turn would prevent me from going back to where I came from, and that I would grow in Love and in the Fellowship of the Spirit. In today, I have maintained my religious beliefs. What I found was that God was so much bigger than I had ever been able to comprehend. Everywhere I went, He was there. I no longer had to keep Him in Church, He was as He revealed Himself to me on a daily basis. When I surrendered in Step One and said, "My way doesn't work, I was empowered to do what I needed to do, one day at a time, to stay clean, to grow, and as I grew in consciousness, I became aware of the Good Orderly Direction in my life. I am powerless over people, place and things, but I am empowered to change myself. I look at the first three Steps as "I came, I came to, and I came to believe" and I work those Steps every morning. Another way of looking at it is "I can't, God can, just for today, I choose to let Him," and I turn my day over to the God of my understanding. When I do that, I am empowered to do what I need to do stay clean and sober, one day at a time.
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