Sixteen Relapse Symptoms

[MajestyJo]

Sixteen relapse symptoms to watch out for:

1. Exhaustion - Allowing oneself to become overly tired; usually associated with work addiction as an excuse for not facing personal frustrations.

2. Dishonesty - Begins with pattern of little lies; escalated to self-delusion and making excuses for not doing what's called for.

3. Impatience - I want what I want NOW. Others aren't doing what I think they should or living the way I know is right.

4. Argumentative - No point is too small or insignificant not to be debated to the point of anger and submission.

5. Depression - All unreasonable, unaccountable despair should be exposed and discussed, not repressed: what is the "exact nature" of those feelings?

6. Frustration - Controlled anger/resentment when things don't go according to our plans. Lack of acceptance. See #3.

7. Self-pity - Feeling victimized, put-upon, used, unappreciated: convinced we are being singled out for bad luck.

8. thingyiness - Got it made. Know all there is to know. Can go anywhere, including frequent visits just to hang-out at bars, boozy parties.

9. Complacency - Like #8, no longer sees value of daily program, meetings, contact with other alcoholics, (especially sponsor!), feels healthy, on top of the world, things are going well. Heck may even be cured!

10. Expecting too much of others - Why can't they read my mind? I've changed, what's holding them up? If they just do what I know is best for them? Leads to feeling misunderstood, unappreciated. See #6.

11. Letting up on disciplines - Allowing established habits of recovery - meditations, prayer, spiritual reading, AA contact, daily inventory, meetings - - to slip out of our routines; allowing recovery to get boring and no longer stimulating for growth. Why bother?!

12. Using mood-altering chemicals - May have a valid medical reason, but misused to help avoid the real problems of impending alcoholic relapse.

13. Wanting too much - Setting unrealistic goals: not providing for short-term successes; placing too much value on material success, not enough on value of spiritual growth.

14. Forgetting gratitude - Because of several listed above, may lose sight of the abundant blessings in our everyday lives: too focused on # 13.

15. "It can't happen to me." - Feeling immune; forgetting what we know about the disease of alcoholism and its progressive nature.

16. Omnipotence - A combination of several attitudes listed above; leads to ignoring danger signs, disregarding warnings and advice from fellow members.


-- Akron Intergroup News, December 1998

#8 gave me a moment of thought. A friend of mine said the other day, "You have come too far and done so much you don't want to drink. Just for a nanno second the thought was, "I could probably have just one glass of wine." We were sitting in a restaurant/bar waiting for other members of the bridge club to join us. As the saying goes, "Where did that come from." Duh! You are sitting in a bar. What do people do in a bar? I have gone in there before because they have good food but have never gone in when it was busy. I learned that lesson early by going there with a friend many years ago on Gray Cup day and I found myself about to reach out and look at the bottle of wine sitting on the table beside me. This disease is cunning, baffling and powerful.

Posted on another site in March 2009.

It is the thinking behind my disease that can lead me to relapse.

[honeydumplin]

Number eight reminds me of one of those too close for comfort occasions, when about a year and a half without a drink, working out of town much more than a program, with little contact with anyone, I found myself at the end of a very long, and rather hectic day, both mentally and physically exhausted.

Even though my mind was preoccupied with work, and other personal and political issues, I was hungry and decided to go into the lounge of a restaurant that I'd frequented before under different circumstances.

While unconsciously glancing at the dinner menu, I can remember the server asking me what I wanted to drink. Without ever missing a beat, the phrase that had been said to bartenders for a very long time, almost came out. It didn't wake me from my stupor until that point, when I almost ordered one without even thinking about it.

[MajestyJo]

When I found myself impatient, which was often, I would use the automatic door opener, and it was so slow, it was difficult to stand their and wait for it to open, without giving it a little push to speed things up.

I even did the count from 100 to 1 thing, which I found frustrating. Usually used the Serenity Prayer. Found I couldn't wear it out.

We are only an arms lengths away. I was with a friend for lunch. We picked the wrong day, it was Gray Cup Day here in Ontario. It was so loud I could hardly hear her. There was a bottle of Bochtaler, not sure of the spelling but it was a wine I use to like drinking. It was on the table of the booth beside us, and I found myself reaching out to touch the bottle. It was a real wake up call for me.

Thank you both for sharing.

[dwmoeller]