Today's Thought - June

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June 1

We have within us a limitless supply of new beginnings.
--Joan Fitzgerald

We can start our day over any time we choose. If we wake up crabby, on the "wrong side of the bed," we are not doomed to a day of gloom. Each minute can be a new reality for us. We can start a new day with just an ounce of willingness. There are days when we get stuck in the mud of depression. Part of us wants to begin again and another part seems to like to dig around in our problems. We might even feel like just staying stuck in the dark side of today. As addicts, we are used to feeling betrayed, injured, persecuted, and generally sick and tired.

Willingness to try another way is the start. We can take a second to choose to look at our gray day in a more positive way.

Today let me start over when I find myself glued to my troubles and negativity.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

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June 2

When it seems we have no recourse, we can always pray.

Coming to believe that a Higher Power can help us and relieve us of our worry may take time if we have spent years trying to stop someone's drinking or worrying about how to keep the family together. From others in this program we can learn the steps to take. Becoming willing to pray is the first one.

We'll soon discover that the power of prayer is awesome. Here are six compelling reasons why:
(1) Prayer promises relief when we are anxious.
(2) Prayer connects us with our Higher Power when we feel isolated and full of fear.
(3) Prayer frees our minds from the obsession to plan other people's lives.
(4) Prayer helps us take action when we feel compelled to change the circumstances of our lives.
(5) Prayer becomes a wonderful resource to draw on when living through our painful moments.
(6) And prayer gives us the willingness to accept God's solution for every problem that plagues us.

I will utilize prayer today every time I wonder what I should do.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

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June 3

Don't miss out on today's learning experiences.

They won't come again. We will never have another day exactly like today, so let's take advantage of the lessons we're offered.

We don't like to make mistakes, and we don't like to be in situations that are fraught with stress, but mistakes and distress seem to go along with being human and alive. Both can be turned into sound learning experiences.

We don't learn if we try to deny or ignore the situation we don't like or don't handle well. How much better if we can accept the difficulty, see how we have contributed to it, and arrive at a positive course of action. And how often it helps to talk about the problem with someone else instead of pridefully insisting on muddling through alone. Very likely, we will discover that today's richest learning experiences are those we share with others.

I will accept the lessons today offers and share them with someone else so that we both can grow.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

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June 4

Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, "It might have been."
--John Greenleaf Whittier

Unless we live in the now, we are in danger of suffering the agony of regret. We can't spend all our time thinking "life's not fair." We cannot afford to excuse everything with "what ifs?" We used those words constantly during the years we wasted on obeying compulsions we knew could destroy us.

We remember the years before recovery and accept them as object lessons of what it could be like again if we become careless or complacent. But we don't regret them. Regret only leads to depression and perhaps a return to active addiction.

We must stop dwelling on the impossibility of undoing the wrongs of yesterday. Instead, we must begin enjoying the "right things" that are now possible in recovery.

It is impossible to relive my past. I can only create a good past now by living this day the best way I can, so that tomorrow I can look back without having to say "It might have been."

You are reading from the book:

Easy Does It by Anonymous

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June 5

Ideally, both members of a couple in love free each other to new and different worlds.
--Anne Morrow Lindbergh

We cannot possess another's spirit, even though we may desire to do so while struggling to feel love. We must not block one another's invitations for adventure even though we fear being left behind. We won't find the happiness we long for if we've tied another to ourselves by strings of shame, guilt, or pity.

Being free to love, or not, is the only path to real love. A trapped butterfly soon loses its splendor - and life; likewise, a trapped lover quietly awaits the relationship's death.

Traveling separate, yet parallel, paths keeps a relationship vital. Bringing fresh ideas, favored hopes, and fruitful experiences to each other's attention is the enhancement a relationship must have to stay strong.

Let's not corner our partners but instead trust that real love is the promised gift of being free.

You are reading from the book:

Worthy of Love by Karen Casey

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June 6

Getting angry can sometimes be like leaping into a wonderfully responsive sports car, gunning the motor, taking off at high speed and then discovering the brakes are out of order.
--Maggie Scarf

Anger can multiply our difficulties in many situations. All of us can look back and remember times when we only made our problems worse because we stepped on the gas and lost all ability to use the brakes.

Now we are growing into more adulthood. We are learning to manage our feelings and use them well. This doesn't happen overnight. We would do well to recall how energized we have felt when we let our anger fly and how much we loved that energy at the moment. Only later did we face the damage we caused. Saying we are sorry isn't enough: we must also be willing to take on the harder task of changing our behavior. When we accept that we love the power and the energy of our anger and aggression, we can begin to rein it in and take charge of it rather than be ruled by it.

Today I will not indulge in the pleasure of anger allowed to run wild.

You are reading from the book:

Wisdom to Know by Anonymous

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June 7

Not only then has each man his individual relation to God, but each man has his peculiar relation to God.
-- George MacDonald

Each of us sees and experiences God in a way somehow unique to us. No two people see things exactly alike. That's why our program has no dogma. Each of us is encouraged to follow a spiritual path that seems to have been created for us. And we need not worry if we're on the right one, because every path leads to God. Would God let us lose our way? Of course not. We will know if a course correction is needed, and God will lead us to it.

Each of us understands God in a way no one else does. There's a place in God's love for each of us. And out of that place we can bring light to other people, just as our own special people have brought their light to us.

I will cultivate my unique vision of God so that I may bring light to someone else.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

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June 8

She walks around all day quietly, but underneath it she's electric; angry energy inside a passive form. The common woman is as common as a thunderstorm.
--Judy Grahn

Many people spend their days in anger and aren't aware of it. The conditions of work and life make many of us angry; we feel powerless to change them, and our frustration angers us more.

The Serenity Prayer asks for "...the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." If we examine our lives fearlessly, we may find many things that are in our power to change.

Since we cannot change, or do not choose to change some things, we'd do well to accept them, instead of spinning our wheels in unproductive anger or turning the anger in, against ourselves. And when we summon the courage to change the things we can, our lives will bless us.

Today I'll look at anger as something I've chosen, instead of something inevitable. Is it covering fear? How can I resolve it?

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

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June 9

We need the courage to start and continue what we should do, and courage to stop what we shouldn't do.
--Richard L. Evans

What is courage? Many of us think it involves surviving against all odds. Some of us believe courage is personified by an individual like Helen Keller, who coped with many physical defects to vastly change her life and the lives of those around her. Others of us believe courage is personified by people like astronaut John Glenn, who took risks trying something new knowing he could fail.

Are we courageous? Compared to those people we would probably say no. Yet we are because we have taken risks to change our lives. Being willing to change is an act of courage. Believing in change and forging ahead on the new, uncharted path is an act of courage.

We are the only ones who can change ourselves. Just as Helen Keller and John Glenn made decisions to alter their lives, so do we make decisions to risk changes. Whether we started on our new way of life years ago, days ago, or even hours ago, we are filled with courage because of the decisions we made.

I can say the Serenity Prayer and remember my courage.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

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June 10

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
-- Chinese proverb

Life holds so many choices now that we are sober. We'd like to go so many places. We'd like to see so many things. We have so much to do.

We are slowly learning how to trust our dreams and reach for them. Our program teaches us that we live One Day at a Time. We make progress by doing First Things First, Easy Does It.

Our dreams may seem very big and far away. We wonder if we'll ever get there. But our faith tells us to go for it. And we know how: One Step at a Time.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me know this gentle truth that my life matters. Help me set goals that I can grow toward, one step at a time.

Action for the Day

Today I'll think about one of my goals. I will list ten little steps that will help me get there.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

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June 11

Having loosened our grip on the past, we are free to reach for the future.
--Ann D. Clark

Everyday of our lives we think of some situation we wish we had handled differently. Perhaps we left a job we now miss, disciplined a child needlessly, or responded rudely to a friend. Our Fourth Step inventory abundantly details our many regrets, but the past is gone. We can't take back the job or the punishment or the rude responses. However, we can make certain the Tenth Step we do every night is not filled with similar regrets.

Recovery has given us a second chance. Let's not waste this gift by hanging on to what can't be changed. We all know what we don't like about our behavior in the past. That's all we need to remember when we decide how to behave in the present. We won't be ashamed in the future, if we take charge of our present.

Today is a new beginning. Whatever happened in my past need not control what I do with today. Today is mine to be proud of.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

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June 12

Dust on diamonds, tears we cry, first we walk, then we fly.
--Mark Chapple

"First things first," "Easy does it," and "Keep it simple" are the touchstones of our recovery. At first, we may grasp recovery like a drowning person. We find that the harder we hold on to our life raft, the harder it is to relax and stay afloat. Letting go a little, we begin to trust that we won't sink. We learn to keep it simple and concentrate on only one thing at a time. We surrender to our life raft and trust that we will be gently carried ashore.

Keeping it simple means trusting others to help us. It allows us to step out of the center of the universe and hold on gently to our supportive friends and our own process of growth.

Today let me get back to basics. Keeping it simple will keep me on the right track.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

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June 13

Fine friendship requires duration rather than fitful intensity.
--Aristotle

Once we have embarked upon this program, we find spiritual recovery through relationships more than any other single factor. We find it through relationships with other people, with ourselves, and with our Higher Power. But most of us in recovery need to learn how to be in a relationship. We have to give up ideas that a friendship is an intense connection or a conflict-free blending of like minds.

A meaningful friendship is a long-term dialogue. If there is conflict or if we make a mistake or fail to do what our friend wants of us, we don't end the friendship. We simply have the next exchange to resolve the differences. Our dialogue continues over time, and time - along with many amends - builds the bond. With it develops a deepening sense of reliability and trusting one another. When we have lived with our friend through many experiences - or with our Higher Power - we gain a feeling that we really know him or her in a way we could never have in a brief intense connection.

Today, I will do what I need to do to be reliable in my friendships.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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June 14

I don't believe in predicting, especially about the future.
-- Casey Stengel

With the pace of change continuing to accelerate, the future is not what it used to be. From one moment to the next, no one can be certain of anything. Your job, your marriage, and your relationship to your children - none of these may be the same next year, next month, or even next week.

How does one survive this changing landscape? First, by being flexible and adaptable - ready to change course at any moment. Be prepared to "roll with the punches" and release your old attachments or current expectations.

Second, practice living one day at a time. Realize that the only thing you can really affect is how you feel this instant. By focusing on the present moment, you can continue to experience peace and joy - no matter how the outer circumstances may change.

Finally, know that the removal of old securities opens the way to new opportunities. Human consciousness is moving to ever-higher levels of awareness. How much easier the journey is when we flow with the process of change.

You are reading from the book:

Listening to Your Inner Voice by Douglas Bloch

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June 15

Taking Care of Ourselves

It's healthy, wise, and loving to be considerate and responsive to the feelings and needs of others. That's different from caretaking. Caretaking is a self-defeating and, certainly, a relationship defeating behavior - a behavior that backfires and can cause us to feel resentful and victimized - because ultimately, what we feel, want, and need will come to the surface.

Some people seem to invite emotional caretaking. We can learn to refuse the invitation. We can be concerned; we can be loving, when possible; but we can place value on our own needs and feelings too. Part of recovery means learning to pay attention to, and place importance on, what we feel, want, and need, because we begin to see that there are clear, predictable, and usually undesirable consequences when we don't.

Be patient and gentle with yourself as you learn to do this. Be understanding with yourself when you slip back into the old behavior of emotional caretaking and self-neglect.

But stop the cycle today. We do not have to feel responsible for others. We do not have to feel guilty about not feeling responsible for others. We can even learn to let ourselves feel good about taking responsibility for our needs and feelings.

Today, I will evaluate whether I've slipped into my old behavior of taking responsibility for another's feelings and needs, while neglecting my own. I will own my power, right, and responsibility to place value on myself.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie