Wisdom Of The Rooms - 2024

[bluidkiti]

July 8

Quote of the Week

"Advice that is not asked for is criticism."

I have someone in my life who, after asking me how I’m doing and I begin to tell her, immediately starts telling me the things I need to change or start doing. Until this quote, I didn’t realize that the reason her unasked-for advice made me feel so bad was that it was thinly veiled criticism of the way I was living my life.

Thank God the program doesn’t work that way. If people in the program, or my sponsor, started giving me unsolicited advice or telling me what to do, I would have left long ago. Instead, people give me suggestions (when I ask for them) based on their own experience. If they had a similar situation as mine and they did something that worked for them, then they may suggest that it might work for me as well. It’s up to me at that point to try it or not.

Because of the program, I have learned to apply this wisdom in my other relationships also. In fact, people now call me a good listener, and it’s because I know that all that people really want is to be heard and understood. If asked, the best I can do is share my experience with a similar situation—if I have it. Otherwise, it’s best to just listen, empathize, and help them process their experience. That’s always better than giving advice that’s not asked for.