Chipping Away at Defects of Character

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will try not to worry and fret and stay in the moment, and let the day unfold as it should and trust my Higher Power to see me through.

My doctor is never on time. My appointment isn't until 5:10 p.m. and I keep asking myself, why did I book this appointment so late. I am his last patient of the day. I want to see him, not an intern, as I want to discuss my medication, my loss of balance, and my headaches with him. I think these are all related, so I don't want a go between person, trying to convey my needs to him.

I also have booked darts for 7:15 p.m. for pick up at home to go to an AA meeting that starts at 8 p.m. I have pick up for 9:30 p.m. A long time friend is speaking and another good friend is going to be there. I haven't been to the group for about 15 years. I will put my day into the hands of my Higher Power and trust instead of worry.

[dwmoeller]

Just for today, I will have a quiet time all by myself and relax.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will practice the program in ALL of my affairs. This is a living program.

[dwmoeller]

Just for today, I will practice rigorous honesty. It is one of the keys to sobriety. You need to be honest with yourself, others, and your Higher Power.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I have to try not to be greedy and eat too many cookies. I also had to practice patience, waiting for four pans of cookies to bake. My oven doesn't seem to cook things according to directions, so had to have some tolerance too. The Serenity Prayer works in my life, so grateful for it.

This tells me to maintain balance in my life. Have a cookie, but don't eat all that you bake, although I sometimes feel like I have to get my share before my son eats them all.

[dwmoeller]

Just for today, I will help others to make life easier. I just saw a worker here carrying a garbage can to the dumpster outside. it is a ways from the building. I offered him my two wheeled cart so he won't have to carry it so far. It is easier to push it on a cart than to carry it. I asked him if it was a good idea and he smiled, said yes, and thanked me.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will try to find some acceptance of where I am in today. I had another fall, and I think it is the neuropathy, osteo, and pseudo gout that is causing the problem not my medication. My feet and legs are numb to my knees, my ankles hurt and my feet hurt to bend. I don't think my feet are always flat on the floor. My son has been giving me heck for a while, he keeps saying, "Use your cane Mother so you don't fall." So, again it is Step One. It was the topic for discussion at my group today as we had a newcomer. As one fellow share, "I have to do Step One every day." I thought, "Duh, you know that, my life is unmanageable when managed by me. If I have to control it, it is already out of control. Acceptance is the key to all my problems in today.

[dwmoeller]

Just for today I will remind myself that I stay sober for me, not someone else (like my son), otherwise it won't work. So one day at a time For myself, I choose to be sober and not pick up that drink.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will forgive myself. I spent most of my day in bed. For me that isn't living. I just woke up after a four hour nap. I only was up for six hours today. My heart was acting funny and I couldn't seem to stay awake. I tried to do meditation, and I realize now, that I should have done more. I allowed my pain and my dis-ease to rule my life, and that isn''t an option, if I want to be living sober in today.

This looks like they are playing that old game I played as a child, "London Bridge is falling down." I feel like my world is falling down, when I can't get up and do what I need to do each day.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will practice patience, patience, patience. Didn't like having to cancel my visit to my sister, but when I phoned her, I found out that she hadn't been feeling well for a couple of days.

I woke up earlier, but found I just had to go back to bed. I lose patience with myself. I don't need anyone around to lose my patience. My worst enemy can be me.

[dwmoeller]

Just for today, I will take care of myself. I am half sick and I'm doctoring myself with over-the-counter medicine. I may have to go to the doctor. I may be getting bronchitis again.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will try to follow doctor`s orders. I have to go to see him every week, except for one week where I go to the nerve specialist.

No cutting corners, no ifs, ands, and buts, it is do it! No easing off in any way shape or form. I can talk myself into anything and out of everything.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will continue to practice patience and tolerance. I am grateful for the program, I sure needed it today. I still have to call Darts, so will need it when I speak to them.

I have to book to see the heart specialist for the month of March and possibly for April as well. It took such a long time for them to go through when I booked them for my weekly group meetings. One day at a time, things work out in spite of me.

[dwmoeller]

Just for today, I will be happy even though I am feeling pretty crappy with my bronchitis and ear infection.

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I will remember that for every finger I point out, I have three coming back at me. I have a problem with noise and it is even worse, if it is a raised voice and it is directed at me. There was a time when I would get defensive and make noisy back, but I try not to do that in today.

Patience and tolerance were in short supply today.