You know it’s a bad day when. . .

[bluidkiti]

You know it’s a bad day when:

You call your answering service and they tell you it’s none of your business.

You put on your pants backwards and they fit better.

Your horn accidentally goes off and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell’s angel’s on the freeway

You sink your teeth into a beautiful steak and they stay there.

The worst player on the golf course wants to play you for money.

Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

Your 4-year-old tells you that it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit down the toilet.

You realize that you just sprayed spot remover under your arms instead of deodorant.

You discover that your 12-year-old's idea of humor is putting crazy glue in your Preparation H.

You start to put up the clothes you wore home from the party last night....... and there aren't any.

It costs more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.

You wake up to the soothing sound of running water...and remember that you just bought a waterbed.

Everyone avoids you the morning after the company office party.

You wake up and your braces are stuck together.

Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife/ex-husband.

Your income tax refund check bounces.

You put both contact lenses in the same eye.

You need one bathroom scale for each foot.

You call your wife and tell her that you would like to eat out tonight and when you get home there is a sandwich on the front porch.

The restaurant check has been on the table for ten minutes...and no one has touched it.

Nothing you own is actually paid for.

You go on your honeymoon to a remote little hotel and the desk clerk, bell hop, and manager have a "Welcome Back" party for your new spouse.

Airline food starts to taste good.

Your doctor tells you that you are allergic to chocolate chip cookies.

Your cat abandons the nice box you prepared for her and has her kittens in your dresser drawer.

You realize that the phone number on the bathroom wall of the bar is yours.

Your kids start treating you the same way you treated your parents.

The gypsy fortune teller offers to refund your money.

People think you are 40...and you really are.

Your new lover calls to tell you "Last night was terrific." and you remember that you were home by yourself.

Everyone is laughing but you.