Alcoholic man and still in recovery

[RickyWard]

I am Ricky Ward from LA and I am Alcoholic. I got alcoholic after my Dad died last year. I have a broken family and I'm an only child. Alcohol makes me happy. I felt like I am on a different world. When my father died last year, I now fully understood why he had to drink much. After my parents broke up, my dad told me that alcohol was his medicine to cure his depression on their separation. Today, since I am on my own, with no parents to approach, I saw alcohol as my crying shoulder. I don't know why. It’s just that, I love it. I went to this thread because I want to share my feelings when I was in the influence of alcohol. My mind seems to think my past. I am very vocal when I'm tipsy but I don't know the details when I'm already drunk. My friends are telling me that I am very talkative when I was in the influence of alcohol. I wish I can talk to everyone for my recovery